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A public service announcement

no hello

Don't open with "hello" and wait. Say why you're here — it's one message, not a phone call.

4 min+

avg. time lost per "hello"

2×

the messages it takes

0

information conveyed

Exhibit A — the slow way

#dev-team
K
Keith2:15 PM
hi
Y
You2:19 PM
hello?
K
Keithis typing…
Time wasted

Keith could have had his answer four minutes ago. A bare "hello" forces a context switch and delivers nothing to act on.

or, the fast way

Exhibit B — sixty seconds, done

#dev-team
D
Dawn2:15 PM
Hey! Do you know what time the team meeting is today?
Y
You2:16 PM
Yep, it's at 3:30 PM!
Answered in 60s

✗ — Don't open with

  • "Hello"
  • "Hi Taufeeq, quick question"
  • "You got a sec?"
  • "ping"

✓ — Lead with the ask

  • "Hey! When's the deadline for X?"
  • "Hi, could you send me the report?"
  • "Quick q — what's the login for Y?"

Same greeting. Same warmth. Just with the question attached.

Inspired by nohello.net

(⚠ this page contains traces of sarcasm. viewer discretion advised.)